Soul Healing

You know those days where you think you should crawl back in, pull the covers so far over your head that maybe you could start even yesterday over? Today was that day.
My mommy cloak was already tattered when I rolled out of bed, but still full of helpful power I thought. I threw it on with cautious hope as I rose out bed early to the tune of my one year old chirping. It wasn't so bad, this early thing, I thought to myself - He is chirping and not crying, and I could hear that music all day long. Such a start to the morning, it seems impossible that in only the matter of 30 minutes, everything was able to shift.
It is my job as the mother, to set the tone of the house, at least for my children. Right or wrong, that is how I feel. Now, I come at that idea from a disadvantage because my mother was always putting her best joyful heart forward. Looking back, I really can only remember a small handful of times that my mother was crazy like I am on most of my days. What a thing to be said of a person. I would put that as my ideal to work towards, but if you ask my daughter, I am sure that is already shot.
So I long for this - My day that is filled with crying, falling, bruises, short naps, snotty noses, over-tiredness, not-sharing, running over fingers, burp up.....etc, this day that is filled with such chaos and the makings of what would rightly cause massive anxiety - that I may look back at this day and be 1. Thankful I was lucky enough to have it, 2. Strong enough to know that I CAN do again tomorrow, and most importantly 3. I am so blessed to have this ALL.
Tonight I knew, my soul knew, that I needed to go to Enrichment. My heart has had a dull ache for some time now. I realized that it wasn't my heart at all tonight, it was my soul. I have been so far away from what anchors me, that I got to the point of more than just wondering, that it had forgotten how to heal itself.
I have been so focused on what is going on in my little world with babies/toddlers/showers/cleaning that I have stopped looking outwards. To me that is when you open yourself up to all whole new level of blessings. To look around and help those that are struggling and aching just like me. My soul was crying out for the spirit to touch it, and tonight I was surrounded by it. All my ward sisters glowed of it, and it felt amazing to be in their presence.
My soul, torn from many weeks, maybe months of neglect, has been healed tonight by those that love the gospel as much as I do. I am so grateful I was prompted to go by such a dear friend. I love her with all my heart. She has been a blessing from God to me, and I will forever be grateful.